When the Goal becomes a Stepping StonE
Katie McKinstry and I chat about her ‘20/’21 ice climbing season, her relationship with the unknown, developing focus, and sending the Sceptor (WI5)!
Project Direct athlete Katie Mckinstry sending
scepter (WI5), hyalite canyon, MT
I started working with Katie in November 2020. When we first met, I asked her to tell me a bit more about her relationship with ice climbing:
My passion is ice climbing. I put a lot of pressure on myself though. I like to lead and be the one putting up the rope. But my headspace is inconsistent. When I get fearful, I get fully consumed by it and I can’t get it back for the rest of the day.
With climbing, everyone talks about the strength and the physical difficulties that come with getting on a climb. But for some reason, the mental aspect is left to the side and suffers. I think we as climbers don’t spend as much time with our headspace as we should because we don’t have as direction as to how to strengthen our headspace as much of a direction as we do for our physical space (such as climbing gyms, and crags).
Learning more about Katie, her past, and her current goals, we knew that her mental game was holding her back more than anything else. I was very honored to get to help her in this realm!
As we started to work together, I asked her to be witness to her headspace for a few days so we could find triggers, assess focus levels, and start to develop new habits. She describes her headspace on one of our early weeks of working together:
Climb: Lower Avalanche Gulch, WI3
My mind started to wander when I was on the short but steep section of this climb. I was thinking about the topout, and what was ahead that I couldn't see. The simple act of looking for my mind wandering allowed me to start realigning it before things got too frantic.
Then, when I got to the top out, it was less than ideal, it was totally delaminated and unattached from the rock, and water was flowing underneath it.
But, I was in a good mental place to climb through a sketchy section and do it well. I was super proud of myself because these are the sections that make me so nervous, and I know the more sections I climb like that the more I will be able to work through the unknown fear of not knowing what was ahead.
It became clear as we talked more that the unknown, or what we started to call the zone of the unknown, triggered Katie’s attention drift. Her focus on these upcoming portions of climbs disallowed her to focus fully on the part of the climb she was currently doing. Developing focus and confidence around these sections of a climb (the parts that you couldn’t see from the ground) was really important to progressing her headspace.
Changing habits and thought patterns requires
Entrance into the triggering terrain in a lower stress scenario
Success in this terrain - cuing our brain to accept we do have the skills required for climbing in this terrain and can rely on ourselves to make decisions in the present moment
Repetition - forging a new neural pathway that becomes a habit takes many repetitions
Progression - moving into more stressful terrain with a newly developed habit until you are able to encounter and process triggers by using your new habit or mental strategy!
How this develops for each climber is different. For Katie, having a visual focal point was a really grounding method. She describes another moment during her season where she started to get scared but was able to regain her focus.
Route: The Wedgy, WI2
I got stuck thinking about the crux but I hadn't even finished swinging my tool yet. The ice was platey and it was an insecure spot. I wasn't thinking about the insecurity of my position, I was thinking about the crux that was ahead of me.
So I stopped for a second and really just focused on that single tool placement. Once I did that, and just focused on that movement, it was like all the fear of the crux faded away. Then once I was in the actual crux I was able to just climb it and take the moves as they came.
Later, she journaled…
Of the ways we worked on, visual focus points have been the most helpful. I start by focusing on one specific thing- like a drop of water on an icicle, or the screw grabbing the ice, or the way ice looks in a specific spot, just making my world a little smaller for a few seconds.
As we started to gain more and more traction with her new mental strategies, we added a few more components to her process. It was time to look towards the season’s goal: Scepter. A beautiful WI5 in Hyalite Canyon, MT.
I asked her to print out a picture of it and post it in her bathroom -- with the note “this is a possibility” under it. Waiting for the right conditions and considering all of the ways she could stay in an open headspace for it...
And then, on February 2nd, 2021, Katie did it!
When I asked how it went, she said used all the habits we worked on to secure the send:
I knew that this goal was very possible for me, but I wasn’t sure if it was going to happen this season. But as I roped in and got on the ice I felt the most present, the most calm, and the most excited I have ever felt on a climb, and those feelings didn’t fade, I was able to continue my mantra “you are here, you are present” the entirety of the climb, stay present while shaking out, and focusing on the experience that was currently happening not the one that was out of my control.
I had two moments of mind wandering. One was when I thought about how long the climb looked (115ft of steep!) and the second was thinking about topping out too soon. I slowed it down with the mantra we had been practicing.
This climb and this lead were exactly what I had hoped it would be, and it feels like it is the stepping stone for the next part of my climbing, and being able to move forward with climbing harder ice consistently. I did it though! And I am so damn proud of myself! I don’t know if I would have been able to do that without you, Karly.
To say it was an honor to be a part of Katie’s season would be an understatement. So excited to work with you again Katie! And to support you in all you do on and off the ice!
What are some of your overall thoughts on your season and working on your headspace for the first time in a dedicated, structured way?
From the beginning until the end we worked on finding the moments of being distracted, and not focusing on the task at hand, recognizing those moments, and finding, and creating new habits to be able to be more present, and focused in the moment.
For me, the biggest difference I have noticed is just my ability to bring myself back to the present. Thinking about all the moments this season, and the highs, lows, and the betweens, the best by far was having all this work come to fruition while leading Scepter.
It is so worth finding a coach who will be just as much invested in your climbing, goals, headspace, and personal self as you are. For me, I found you and Project Direct Coaching. You continued to listen, ask, and were always invested in my climbing the entirety of the process. You worked to adjust the training program for my struggles, and goals. If anyone is looking to strengthen their headgame, and be in a better place mentally, you’re the coach to look for!
Katie turned this possibility into reality this year! So proud of you! Much love Katie!
